Saturday 19 March 2016

Scottish Government Gobbledygook Generator a total success

"Blue sky thinking" more gobbledygook?
Government computer projects usually come to a sticky and expensive end but not this one, It's The Scottish Rural Payments and Inspection Gobbledygook Generator" (SGRPIGG) operated by Trolls in the basement of Saughton House. It has done it's job, we are too confused and demoralised to complain about the late payment brought on by a cock up with a different computer on another floor.

The program generates letters to Crofters about the non-payment , late payment or actual payment of subsidies,  letters that are totally unintelligible and therefore meaningless. We have all had a letter this week ( four sides of A4) telling us, I think, that our "less favoured areas" payment will be made before the end of March. and that it will be less than last year. That much I understand, perhaps.

Four paragraphs of gobbledygook follow then eight paragraphs of terms and conditions also largely unintelligible to a native English speaker. We are then invited to accept or reject the money and terms despite not having a clue what they are talking about. We seem to have decided collectively to do nothing and just take the money.

This is my only post without an appropriate  image, if I show you the letter I might be contravening the Official Secrets Act and its difficult to get a picture of government thinking.

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